Adam was working on some extra credit today for English. The assignment was to pretend to be a Christmas tree and write a letter to someone convincing them they should pick you. Here’s what Adam came up with:

Dear Family,

Hello, I am Troy the Tree. Not to brag, but I am the best tree in the lot, and probably everywhere else too. I already know you will buy me. I mean who else would you buy? That shrub Sherman over there?

You those know those tree air fresheners? They wish they smelled like me. I am the perfect shade of green. I have full branches, perfect for holding garland, ornaments, and lights. Of course, I would look more than fine without all that. I think we all know that I’m the best tree.

Your future tree,
Troy

P.S. I can guarantee that I am bug free.